Pamper days are essential for the elderly

I know that some of you are feeling the tension of not having your weekly scheduled hair appointment or your monthly nail and brow touch up, So I know you’ll understand todays topic. Pamper time! .

The older our parents get, the less they are able to do for themselves. Usually taking them for a mani/pedi is a great way for relaxation and also circulation for their feet. Spa days are also a great way to help. But since we are all stuck in #lockdown with #covid19, here are a few home pampering ideas.

1.Fill a dish wish warm water (diabetics do not do well with hot water so make sure it’s a good temperature). Add black vinegar and coarse salt or Epsom salts. This will release tension in their feet, help with any pain and also soften calloused feet. End off with a foot scrub, nail trim and a foot and leg massage. Yes you will get your hands dirty but your parents will love this and appreciate you. 

2.Another way to pamper your parents, is by making sure they take a warm shower (bathing becomes complicated later in the lives of our elderly, unless you have several hands to help you.) Much like with kids your bathroom needs to be “#elderlyproofed”(A conversation for another day). A nice backrub after a shower or bath is like heaven for the elderly, our local “rub rub” or arnica oil or aspercreme works great to relieve joint and muscle pains. If your parent has a heart condition, please check with the doctor before using cremes with anti inflammatory ingredients like voltaren gel.

3.A quick hair wash and blow dry or plait day is another way to pamper your parents, for your dads, please don’t try to cut his hair if you don’t know what your doing, but a quick shampoo and conditioner with a head massage is a winning recipe. .

Always check with a medical professional what is best for the elderly person in your care. 

#elderly #caregivers #elderlycare #elderlylove 

How to break communication barriers and help encourage healthy conversation  with your #parents or #grandparents 

It is often difficult to shift into caregiver mode when your parents are older and view your as their baby. The shift does not come easily. So it’s imperative for you to get on the same page with them. I have found the following ways helpful in creating healthy conversations. We are still learning of course I am the baby so ya’ll pray for me! 

1.Communication cards are a great way to break awkwardness. Yesterday I learned that my mom would rather jump out of a plane than go on a cruise and dad would like to have Abraham (in the Bible) as his dinner guest. It can be really fun and entertaining.

2.Ask your parents about their past & childhood before they got married. You will learn so much about and yourself. 

3.Introduce your parents to who you are as an adult especially if they were not around to see you grow up into adulthood. Share your stories and journey with them. They love to hear and love to see pics. Share those special moments with them.

4.Always be respectful and by all means try not to raise your voice at them or get agitated when they get something wrong. Much like children, the older our parents get the more affirmation they need that they are doing well. 

5.Jokes and teasing are such a great way to engage with your parents. Have fun. .

If your parents don’t live with you, try to implement these steps over the phone or after #covid_19 #lockdown. Time is precious and so are your parents! Make time for them. 

Please share with anyone who may need this. 

#elderly #caregivers #elderlycare #elderlylove

Technology has certainly come along to make our lives easier but helping the elderly with it can be challenging and tricky sometimes. Especially smart phones, if this is not something they are used to using. 

Here are 4 tips to use technology to your advantage to help the #Elderly during #covid19.

1.Download their old favourite songs and switch off the news for a few hours and play their music loud! After my moms stroke I noticed that her memory wasn’t as great as it was before, but playing some of her favourite songs recently has helped trigger memorization. She sings along and remembers the lyrics it’s so amazing. Music is healing!

2.Download some affirmation albums and play them for them every morning. My parents enjoy repeating the scriptures on their affirmation playlist, it always allows for some quiet time in the home and some time for you to have a moment. 

3.Patiently teach them to use WhatsApp/Texting or Voice messaging. Help to put through calls for them to their friends & family. Even if you get tired of explaining the same thing over and over. (as I sometimes do) Do it again. 

4.Download brain games. I use an app called @mindmate which gives different reading activities, games and videos to help keep my parents minds stimulated. .

Hopefully these tips have been helpful. Remember this disaster is something they have never seen before and every news broadcast and WhatsApp forward tells them that they are at risk. Your voice of reason is so important to them in this season. 

You are so needed! Strength and courage to all the #caregivers out there! Thank you for All you do! 

May God be with you!

 #share with anyone who needs to hear this.

Have you checked in with your parents and grandparents amidst #covid19

With #covid19  and  #LockDown it is important that we do our best to check on our #Elderly! 

If you’ve been following me for a while, you will know that this has become a passion of mine. As a #caregiver to my parents it is my first priority to make sure that I don’t get infected so I have been indoors for the last two weeks and only left out for supplies, but even then made sure I had the right gear on and used the precautionary 1-2 meter rule to make sure I am good. It may seem extreme but do whatever it takes. 

Both my parents are high risk as they are over the age of 75, so it is also my duty to make sure they are well informed and that they stay at home. 

Here are 5 ways to help the elderly today!

1. Call your parents and just talk to them, check on them and ask if they have everything they need. (Food supplies, incontinence supplies, toiletries etc) It is so easy to assume that they are okay, but just watching how my mom washes her hands over and over,I can tell that she has concerns, so I constantly have to reassure her that we are safe here at home and that she is okay. (Washing hands is never a bad thing but make sure they are not filled with anxiousness)

2. Make sure they are able to call you, so send them some air time for those here in South Africa or make sure their phone bill is paid up. Just having the ability to reach out to you and say hello to someone familiar is better than watching the news all day. You may get tired of the 3 or 4 calls in a day but remember this is harder on them than it is on you.

3. Check their medication, make sure their weekly supply of medication and vitamins are prepped and easily available.

4. Add reminders on their cellular devices to eat, take their pills, read a scripture & call a friend. It may sound crazy to you but these simple reminders will help them add some structure to these lock down days. 

5. As you know today is Sunday and church is everything to our folks, try and help them log on for their service or a service online to help them keep a sense of normality. 

I’ll be back with more tips. 

I am learning that patience is everything with the elderly. 

Be patient, be kind be considerate! 

They need you!

Ma... There’s someone at the gate.

It’s been a while since I’ve been home for Easter, to be honest, I can’t even remember the last time I was home at this time of year. 

3 years ago when I was home, I came in December and left again in the middle of March and that time it was the first time in years I was home for my parents birthdays but I couldn’t miss my dad turning 75. It was also the first time that I was home for more than 3 weeks at a time and I got to be home for 3 months, it was an amazing time. 

It’s crazy how quickly time flies!

From the time i came back last year, I got to be a part of all the activities from Christmas to new year, Dad and Mom’s birthdays, my siblings birthdays and even got to be at our family reunion. 

Now for some it may seem like a small thing to mention, but for years while traveling I would miss just simply being in the room while my nieces and nephews were blowing out candles for their birthdays. Thank God for technology so I could sometimes be a part of the family time. I missed out on weddings, anniversaries, birthdays and even saying goodbye to loved ones at funerals... Although I missed out on so much I would not have changed the path God took me on because he gave me other family that I got to celebrate life with and have all of those above mentioned experiences with. I would not take back a minute of those years. I learned that we make home where we want to. Today I am grateful to call a few places Home and now I am extremely thankful for these moments here with my family, these are special times for me because now my parents get to be a part of this journey and season of my life, no actually let me rephrase that, I get to be a part of this season in their lives... 

In South Africa, Good Friday is a public holiday. Last year I was definitely at Amazon working my tail off and two years prior my roommate and I went to church and then had lunch at Ikea, one of the best Easter memories to date, we ate meat balls and It was so good. Most people that I have encountered in the US don’t really have a lunch on Good Friday like we do here and no one that I met eats or makes pickled fish. So naturally I missed it, but after so many years, I became accustomed to not having it on Easter weekends.

Let me move away from Easter but stick with the theme of adjusting to the things I’ve learned to live without.... 

When I shared an apartment with my roommate Shawn, in the very beginning of our 7 years staying together I learned quickly that if you didn’t plan to visit by letting someone know in advance, she explained that some 
people felt no obligation to open the door when you knocked. This of course shocked me, I remember us having a huge discussion about it because a friend of mine showed up unannounced at our apartment once. I was so happy but she was not happy at all. To me her explanation sounded crazy at first but I had to learn that in the US you call ahead, make an appointment, people don’t just stop by.... Needless to say, that was the last time any of my friends showed up unannounced and after hearing the opinions of some of my other American friends, it became clear to me that it was just the way there. Soon I adjusted and acclimated to the way things were in the US, but it didn’t negate the fact that I grew up completely differently.

Growing up in Nasaret, we would have people stop by our home at any time of day. Especially family members passing through on their way to Mpumalanga or to Johannesburg, we were the half way stop for many friends of my parents and our family members, so I was
 used to people stopping by at any given moment. My 
parents being actively involved in church work hosted preachers and evangelists after services and conventions and we served them with gladness biscuits and tea or even a meal and a place to sleep. We were taught that it was our honor to do so. 

I used to miss the spontaneity of people stopping by in the beginning because it never really happened. There were no random visits, I think I showed up at my friend Monica’s place a few times but she loved me so, she opened for me, haha... I would call when I was around the corner, well sometimes haha. 

I think it only sunk in how much I missed all of that when my friend Keisha and I shared our experiences and similarities in cultures. Keisha was born and raised in Trinidad, she met her husband during college and moved to the United States to study and make a life with the love of her life. Their daughter is my Godchild so we are basically family now. Through lengthy conversations in the beginning, we found that Trinidadians and South Africans share many similarities and we found that her and my cultures are similar.  I mean even down to eating biryani😊 macaroni cheese with minced meat(macaroni pie), curry and roti or rice(which many of my American friends were not fond of) and then of course drinking coffee and tea with condensed milk. 

We spoke about how her home was similar to ours where people would stay over and stop by at any given moment, we bonded through our similarities and when I eventually went to Trinidad for a visit I felt right at home. I fell in love with the Island, the people, the food and especially the music. I mean you can give me Soca any day. I didn’t want to leave and made it a point to go back because there was a sense of home there for me too. Keisha’s parents became like parents to me and her family became mine. So of course back in the US, I would just show up at Keisha’s because she understood where I was coming from and she loved to “lime” (a good long visit) as they say in Trinidad.

When I moved from Houston to the East coast I learned that you really don’t just show up. It’s just not the way it’s done there! You call ahead! So because I didn’t have a car on the east coast I didn’t really show up anywhere. 

The things we miss most when we are away are the very things we learn to live without.

Now that I am back, these spontaneous visits have become something that I am no longer used to and if I’m honest, they catch me off guard every single time. 

Especially now since mom has come home from rehab. She is loved, so we have had several cars (honk) hoot at the gate and many random visits from family and friends and it just seems like I’m never ready. I mean never! On Sunday I asked my mom, “don’t people think not to visit right after church on a Sunday?” 

Immediately I had to remind myself that I was no longer living in the US where you receive a call or text before people stopped by, I was back with my parents where we were raised to serve with gladness and I had to check myself and my attitude. I am having to check myself quite a bit because there are many things I am no longer accustomed to, many things I’ve learned to live without! My perspective had to shift quickly in that moment. I decided to be grateful that people cared enough to come and check on mom and pray with her. The next two days I believe I did much better with the sets of visitors who showed up to see mom.

As you can see, I’m still adjusting to my new normal and my gladness for unannounced visitors will hopefully return as time goes by.  I’m still learning how to adapt the things I’ve had to live without and adapt to my current way of life but I’m also having to decide whether or not to keep all of those things that I grew up with that I have lived without for so long. 

Mom thank you for the lessons you gave us in serving others, they have certainly helped me along my journey. More than anything I am grateful that I can now serve you! 

I’m learning so much about you mom and I’m learning so much about myself as well. Learning where I am strong and accepting where i am weak and have yet to grow stronger! Here with you i am learning so many lessons and I know that I am being prepared for something greater! So thank you for this season of preparation. 

I love you mommy! 

Dear Mom, I’m learning...

It has been quite a few crazy months for us. In fact it’s been a crazy year so far. 

I asked my mom if I could write about this journey of ours and she said yes.
I know that there are many others walking through similar struggles and I hope that my transparency will be of some encouragement, for you to know that you are not alone. 

Who’s report will you believe?
About 7 weeks ago we were told that my mom may never walk again after suffering a stroke and that she will be wheel chair bound... (it was a build up to the stroke but we’ll unpack all of it that in future blogs).

Well, Mom came home from rehab this week and has been taking steps with her walker. 

The thing is, we could have easily just accepted defeat but we chose not to. We didn’t even tell our mother their observations until recently, we simply stayed positive and kept encouraging mom. We told her that she would walk out of the rehab. She may have left the rehab in a wheelchair but she walked into the house with her walker. ( inserts a huge smile)

Role change:

Week 1 as a full time caregiver has been challenging for me, it’s been pruning and a lot of failing forward but I am learning daily. Sometimes it feels like I don’t always know if I’m doing the right thing you know. I simply had a few training days with my mother’s occupational therapist and her physical therapist but it’s all new to me. Even so I am grateful that I had the opportunity to be trained at all. 

The lesson:

Right now I’m learning to have patience, I always thought I was a patient person and I guess I am but I was never tested in the area of my parents! Ha ha! I was in another country for so long so as an adult, I thought my patience was in tact until I moved home! Boy oh boy was I wrong. Living back with the parentals at this age is a challenge jack (blog for another day) 

So I guess I’m embracing the season, and the lesson. I am definitely still studying and have yet to pass this test, but we will get there! 

I know that the journey ahead will not be easy but I surrender to the now and all that comes along with it because I know I am not alone in this. I know that there will be challenges and still a lot of change to adapt to but God is with me and I have phenomenal support from my family and close friends. I’m learning but I want to learn because this time with my parents is priceless, it is time we don’t ever get back. So I am honored to be one this journey with them, no matter how hard it gets! 

You never know what lies behind the smile of another... 

The one scripture that has been a staple in my life  in this season is   “And do not be worried, for the joy of the LORD is your strength and your stronghold.””

‭‭NEHEMIAH‬ ‭8:10‬ ‭AMP‬‬

https://www.bible.com/bible/1588/neh.8.10.amp

Stay encouraged my dear friend. You may be facing your own battle right now, but you are not alone. 

The joy of the Lord is your strength!

Whole #SingleTLM

I really wanted to do a video post about being whole but I filmed twice and it just felt wrong, so I decided to write instead. 

First off I can admit that I'm still working on myself so I'm not perfect by any means and doing these videos are really challenging me in the areas I where need to grow. 
As I continue to have discussions and do research I realize that there are few aspects of being whole that I didn't want to cram into a short a video clip, so here goes.

Whole: a thing that is complete within itself. 

I was going back and forth and after much thought and great discussion with some amazing singles and I came to the following...

To be whole we must focus on mind, body and soul.

Mind: it's important to keep learning. Whether it is a new skill, a new language it's important to keep stimulating your mind! Don't become stagnant or robotic as it will become evident that you have nothing to offer someone else. Keep pouring into yourself ... 

Body: My friend gave me this great quote: "Health is the greatest form of currency"! 

I have come to a point in my life where I am very aware of my choices where my health is concerned. I have to be because there are so many factors. The older I become the more I am aware of my habits, both good and bad and I have to decide daily to choose a better way. I do not always get it right but I strive to do my best... 

Soul: feed your soul! There are so many ways to feed your soul. 

Spend quality time with quality people. I always learn so much from those older than I am and I'm willing to listen where I can grow. Sometimes it's hard to hear truths about ourselves but it's important that we get to a place of reality and vulnerability in order to grow! 

Spend time giving of yourself to others. This is important! As singles we are very selfish at times (topic for another discussion) and it's important to learn how not to be in order to be compatible in relationships with others.

Our belief systems play a huge role in feeding our souls. As a Christian woman I live my life according to the bible and one of the scriptures I often meditate on is Matthew 6:30-33 MSG (I love the whole chapter but this stands out for me and I thought I'd share)

“If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.”

A few points I take from this:

1.TAKE PRIDE IN YOU, do his best for you! Work hard on yourself! Work out. Eat right. Pray a lot! Love yourself!!

2.RELAX- don't be so preoccupied with getting, so you can be open and aware and are able to respond to Everything God has given you and is continually giving you. 

3.STEEP (surround, fill) your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Be prayerful about God's timing and will for your life and be at peace with where He has you and what you need to learn there!!

4.Don’t worry about missing out. We often obsess about what is going to be and miss the Now of our lives, too busy thinking about what will be. 

We have to learn to rest in what is here and now... learn everything you need to right where you are. As Steven Furtick says tell yourself "THIS IS SIGNIFICANT"!

5.All your everyday human concerns will be met. 

Let's talk about the myth of two halves coming together to make a whole... 

I believe that this is what creates unrealistic expectations from our partners in relationship. 

The belief that someone else will fill in the missing pieces for me creates expectations that many times cannot be met. 

We expect our lovers to be our happiness our  everything when realistically our partners merely compliment or enhance what is already there... 

We can only love others to the level that we truly love ourselves. When we do not take the time out to love ourselves wholly, we do ourselves a disservice by expecting our partners to do our work for us. 

This is why i'm of the  belief that the time spent as a single gives us ample opportunity to really have introspection to find out who you are, what we need and what we are able to give and even how we receive... whether it be love, affection, attention, gifts, time. What are my love languages( a great book to read) what is my personality type (try 16 personalities.com) really get to know you, so you are not promoted to present a false image to someone in order to obtain acceptance.

Our time a single people offers us the opportunity to truly Love ourselves first so we are really able to love others... 

Ask yourself:

What Does Whole mean to me?

What does it look like for me? 

How do I get to that place and how will it benefit my future or current relationships 

Blessings Lois.

#10 “A Lois- sized leap”

Thats me... on the left. 😊 I don't know how I did that 😊

Breathe Lois, this needs to be real, honest and open... Now breathe again…

It's been 10 years in this country and 10 days in this new city. As I take a quick look back over my journey, I'm just in awe of Gods goodness in my life.

10 years ago on the 15th of November 2006 I got on a plane and took the biggest leap of faith, and said yes to change.  

At first I thought I was just going on a holiday but after a month here and several conversations, I gave my Yes to God. I left behind my family, my friends, my culture, my country, the career I’d been working toward, my comfort zone, my home and moved to the United States. A series of events that I can truly say was God ordained. I gave a courageous Yes to whatever was ahead. 

I was 26 and super excited.

If I am honest, my intention was not to move here, I was simply visiting. I had work lined up back home, taken on responsibilities and my parents had just moved to Johannesburg to be closer to us, so I just knew that I was coming home. But while I visited Houston, it was clear to me that God had other plans for me. The first few months here were super exciting and new. My life changed tremendously over night, because of two amazing individuals who said yes to God to be the vessels He used to change my life forever. What was meant to be a month of a vacation for my first thanksgiving and Christmas ended up being a whole year and then 9 years. My life changed rapidly! I got the opportunity to travel the world with my one of my favourite singers and what an amazing Journey the last 9 years have been.Too much to write in a blog:)

Now here is the the real part….

Life happens and seasons change, as do we.

The hardest part of moving to another country is trying to fit in. I changed a little more every year. I got lost along the way.... and I didn't even know it. I was so consumed with fitting in that I forgot that all God wanted was my yes and not for me to fit in. Gosh have I learned lessons along the way. 

This past year I was pushed in ways I never imagined. From my job at the Dry Cleaners to my job as a barista/hostess/cashier at my friends new coffee bar, to my various other jobs, while building my jewelry business. I stopped singing for a long time. My father kept asking me to sing again… but I lost my love for singing and I didn’t enjoy it anymore. I sang here and there but I just didn’t even like music for a while. So I threw myself into other things while my heart healed. It has been a great year of healing, learning, and development. It still is.

I had to unlearn certain things that became my way of life and let go.

I learned that failure is simply a part the process. I gained so much freedom when I no longer placed unrealistic expectations on people. I had to learn trust again… Trusting that Gods plan for me was still good. I saw God literally take care of me, miracle, after miracle, after miracle and was reminded that his plan for me was still good. 

IS STILL GOOD!

I had to learn how to Pursue Peace. I’m so excited because I had to learn these lessons to move forward.

Peace brings me here…

10 days ago I moved to a new city… on the 15^th of November 2016 was my first day in my new City. I left behind my family in Houston, my friends, my new found culture, the career I’d been working toward, my comfort zone, my home and moved and said yes to change.

I’m 36 and I’m Super Excited.

I’m singing again. Smiling and laughing again.

I took another leap and released my first single last week. 

Please feel free to check it out and support.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/city-without-you-single/id1174273335

In a farewell card I received when I left Houston one of my friends wrote…

“ This next step won’t be anything short of a Lois-sized leap”

And in another card I received this song:

“Many things about tomorrow, I don’t seem to understand, but I know who holds tomorrow and I know who holds my hand.”

As we celebrate Thanksgiving tomorrow I am so grateful! I look back over the last 10 years with absolutely No regret Only Gratitude and Thanksgiving! I’m excited about what lies ahead. I’m in awe of Gods goodness! Just a few days ago, a friend of mine who once told me she didn’t believe in God came to the revelation that there is a God and He has a plan for her…. (But you’ll have to wait till the next blog to hear her Amazing story) WE HAVE SO MUCH TO BE THANKFUL FOR!

In closing…

LEAP!
Don’t try to skip your process. One step at a time…

-->

Cheers to the next ten. Pursue Peace Always
lois

In Transit... I missed my flight

Yesterday was a great day! I stayed up most of the night before, preparing for my trip.
I had a few stops to make before getting to the airport, but I was running about 30 minutes off schedule because I had to return the car I was using the last few months (Thank you Pastors J&J)
On our way to the airport, I got a notification that the flight was delayed.

Delay number 1...
I checked my bags and then was able to take the car to through the car wash and just spend some much needed time with my trini sister, catching up and talking.
We headed to the terminal, said our goodbyes and then when I got to my gate, I thought I was right on time, to my dismay, the gate was still open but they had already given up my seat... No biggie.

Delay number 2.
I went to rebook my flight. The nice lady at the desk explained that there was no guarantee that I would make it on the flight but that I would be on standby. As I walked up to my next gate, a tall gentleman who I saw at the gate of the flight I just missed was Also on standby. He was very friendly, said hello, had a  very strong "Spanish" accent but I wasn't sure where he was from so I asked. He said he was Mexican, I said wow you're so tall. He didn't go into much detail but explained he was half Israeli, It then made sense to me. Anyways we both made the flight and actually ended up sitting in the same row on opposite sides of the plane.

When we arrived i had about an hour and a half of a lay over so I decided to write. I was so engrossed with my writing and focused with the worship I was listening to waiting for my flight, that i missed it. Only to find out I was never waiting for a flight but a bus... I completely forgot that the bus ride was a part of my itinerary as I booked the flight so long ago... So I missed it again...

Delay number 3
I felt peace as I messaged my roommate who was waiting to pick me up and just sat there and chuckled at myself. As I stood in the line to have my ticket rebooked for the second time, there was a lady ahead of me Crystal and another behind me Jennifer who was on the phone really not happy. She started crying and Crystal explained to me that she missed her flight and that it was her wedding the next day. So we hugged her, loved on her as she waited in the phone while the agent was not very helpful. At this point Crystal and I were encouraging her to remind them that her wedding was the next day and that they had to get her out. She was in tears. Crystal and I holding her and her bags and stuff so she could drink some water. Eventually the agent said go to a certain gate and see if you can get in the line. I decided to run with her as she was so upset. As we ran the agent hung up on her. She was completely confused saying "I don't know if she's rebooked me. I really need my luggage to make the flight so my wedding dress is in there..." Thankfully I was able to call the the premier line and begged the gentleman to please help her. In his tone I could hear confusion, He said... So this has nothing to do with your reservation? I said  I'm delayed but can you help me assist the lady in line with me? He said... So this has nothing to do with you I said yes sir humanity... kindness...

He then hesitantly started looking over her information and was able to reroute her so she could make it to Ireland 45 minutes before her wedding, not ideal but she'll make it...
I said Jennifer relax now, you're getting married tomorrow:) the relief on her face as we made jokes about how she should just put on her wedding dress and make up when she gets to London and fly that way.... We exchanged information. She was so happy and so was I! As I walked back to the service desk where Crystal was holding my spot. Turned out that the next bus was the next morning but the agent explained to me that I could take a different bus and that he would just help me  that I would lose my return ticket.

As I walked downstairs to wait on the next bus I saw Victor, my tall Mexican Jewish friend and he said don't feel weird but I'm going to give you a hug, it's been a long day. So we hugged and then we sat down for about an hour sharing about his stay in South Africa, the different languages we spoke. We spoke about the meanings of certain Jewish words I was interested in, the differences in Christianity and Judaism as he was on his way to celebrate Rosha Hashanna (Jewish New Year) with his family. I just loved every minute sitting there outside of Dunkin' Donuts talking to him.

When I got on the bus at midnight I sat with all my thoughts thinking about each delay. How Amazing God is! If I didn't miss my bus after missing the first flight I would not have been standing in front of Jennifer in line to rebook our tickets and i would not have overheard her on the phone crying, I wouldn't have been able to call to help her...
I would not have met my new friend Victor.
If I was so consumed with getting to where I needed to be in my time, I would have missed out on being a blessing to others in my delay...

God is orchestrating our every move, even in the delays of life. If we would just be present in the delays as we are in the good and busy times, we would find hidden blessings or moments to be a blessing to others. As we wait in Transit let us be aware that God is never absent or fazed by our waiting in fact he strengthens and rejuvenates is in waiting. As I start out this new season of fall, this new month of October I'm grateful for this lesson and reminder.

“He gives power to the faint and weary, and to him who has no might He increases strength [causing it to multiply and making it to abound]. [II Cor. 12:9.] Even youths shall faint and be weary, and [selected] young men shall feebly stumble and fall exhausted; But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him] shall change and renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up [close to God] as eagles [mount up to the sun]; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired. [Heb. 12:1-3.]”
‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭40:29-31‬ ‭AMPC‬‬


Let us not despise the opportunities we've missed in waiting...
Rest in the fact that there is purpose in waiting!


Grateful for new friendships and connections!

Beautiful bride to be Jennifer

My new friend Victor

Random thoughts On a flight to Trinidad!

I was getting ready for my flight last night and so many thoughts came to mind when I took out my passport. So I decided to write.

The last time I was getting ready for a flight, I was scheduled to leave South Africa on my standby buddy pass ticket on the 6th of March 2016.

I bought a buddy pass because the ticket prices were ridiculous that time of year and I really wanted to get home for the holidays as I hadn't been home in a year so, having gotten thy ticket through a really amazing friend I was able to go. What a blessing.
I needed that time with my family!

It was a Sunday afternoon and my family usually gets together for a big lunch before I leave the country and so we had a big party! It was pretty emotional this time, like I wasn't going to be back for a while.... Mmmh... a few of my closest friends were there and my immediate family and some cousins. It was such a special day. We ended it with encouraging words. I felt so loved! So Since my friend Melissa lives close to the airport she decided that she'd drop me off on her way home, and so we headed out.

I knew that there was a possibility that  I may or may not get on the flight but I was confident that I would make the flight because going to South Africa was so easy, no hassles at all.
However as life has it there was a pit stop in my confident plan to leave that day.
Not only did I not get on the first flight, I didn't get on the second, third or 6th or 7th...
Cargo takes preference in Johannesburg so it was a waiting game for so many of us on standby that week. By the end of the week, I knew the desk clerks and some of the passengers waiting. That Friday night, after yet another no, I was exhausted mentally, physically and  emotionally from driving back and forth to the airport and then, after sitting there for a few hours every night, being told No, you didn't make it on the flight today, try again tomorrow for the 6th time, I broke down and just cried. My friend who had come back and forth with me every day saw my exhaustion she was equally tired of the back and forth, so after checking the possibilities of me getting on a flight that Saturday and realizing that they were slim we made an executive decision to not go to the airport that Saturday and decided to stay home. So I went to see my parents and ended up attending my nephews wedding that Sunday morning. I guess it all worked out exactly the way it was meant to.

Over the past 10 years the term "home" has become quite a debatable word for me,  through travel and my journey I've taken more of a fluid approach to the word. I have a home now in a few countries, but home is so much more than a building. That week "home" was with my childhood friend, Melissa. My parents live about 45 minutes away from the airport and it made no sense to go all the way back and forth with Jo'burg traffic, so Melissa offered for me to stay at her place till I got on the flight. We thought it would just be that night you know, when she took me to the airport that Sunday she had no idea that she would have to take me to and fro the airport for a whole week, she just said Yes!

Sometimes in life we have no idea what we are saying yes to. Especially when God is in the driving seat of life. We say Yes and God takes over, in our obedience of yes may come an immediate result of a pause or a not yet or a No...  It is in those times that faith is tested!
Our patience is tried, our emotions are on a 100 and our feelings are easily hurt!
We are vulnerable, at times broken and sometimes we need to break.

I realized that week as I waited, that I was waiting on so much more than my flight, i needed to be quiet, (Sometimes God needs us to be Quiet). During the day my friend went to class so it was just God and I in that apartment and I'll be honest... I did Not hear him speak in a loud clear voice, and perhaps I wasn't listening close enough or maybe I was distracted but I felt quite alone and far away from him! I had so much to process and it just felt like i was alone.
Here's the thing about relationship, sometimes there are quiet moments, does that mean that love changes? No! Sometimes there are breaks, necessary ones, doesn't mean that love has left! Not at all. Love waits through silent moments.So quietly I waited. I went through that week, with a myriad of thoughts and intense introspection. it was the quiet i needed away from the noise of life to be able to hear the voice of God. After 6 days at that airport I unconsciously decided to rest! It's crazy how the rest in our life is so important and yet it's the one thing we neglect. So i waited and through waiting i learned to rest. I made peace with my situation and just enjoyed my time with my family at my nephews wedding. We ate, we danced, we laughed. All of us together.

That Sunday afternoon after my nephews wedding, i headed back to the airport against my family's will and again I wasn't able to get onto the flight...

I think God was secretly preparing me for what was lying ahead in this season of waiting.

See those 8 colourful little stickers on my passport aren't just decorations.
Those are reminders of the test I was given and needed to pass and reminders of the many more tests that lie ahead. Here I am on a flight to one of my favourite countries Trinidad. This is my second trip with this new passport, my first was after the long wait earlier this year.
I anticipate more adventures in this new season of continually waiting and trusting and resting in God. I think about all the other passports in the past, full of stories, memories, tears and proof that God is in control of my life's flight.

I realize all the more how His hand is in it all!
I may question at time the direction and navigation but I tell you something...
God knows my destination!
As this plane prepares to land, I'm looking forward to what God has in store!

Singing...
Thank you Lord for your blessings on me...

Quietly waiting on Love's Direction,
I say Yes again

I REST IN LOVE