Scabs & Scars

It's amazing how quickly my skin bruises. It doesn't matter how soft the knock or the pinch to my skin, it is inevitable that I will have a huge bruise. 

Bruises are one thing but have you ever fallen so hard that your skin is open. Layers of skin deep. It's painful just to look at the scar left behind. 

I fell once, well i fall a lot... You can say i'm a bit of a menace to myself... Look i'm not speaking doom over myself but i seem to somehow find myself tripping, falling down stairs... The works!

This time though. I remember it so clearly, it was right before Christmas 2007. I was in South Africa, excited to be home for the first Christmas after moving to the states. December is really a time for family and fun in South Africa. It's summer time:-) Simply lovely! Family members pop up at any time to say hello:-) its just great and because I had recently come home we had quite a few visitors. This day in particular, my aunt from Swaziland and her daughter as well as my other cousin were around. I was so excited when I saw my cousin I somehow skipped the back door step on my way back in the house and fell so hard with my face against the side of the door. Leaving a horrible tear on the left side of my face & In an instant I could have lost my eye... Breathe....  I'm still in tact:-) The bruise was extremely bad, ugly in fact, accompanied by the cut from above to below my left eye.    

I was completely freaked out because I had just completed rehearsals for the musical I was doing in New Zealand starting in January! The only thing I could think of at that moment was how will I cover the scar with make up... I didn't think about the fact that I almost Lost my eye.... Let me say that again...

I was so concerned with covering my Scar that for a moment I surpassed greatfulness for they eye I didn't loose! Man... 

It took a while for the scar to heal... I spent the rest of december with a blue eye... Not a good look walking through the mall during the festive season when my country is hugely apposed domestic violence against women especially at this time of the year. To cover it up I switched my hair from wearing it to the right side to wearing it on the left... Thankfully it was long enough to cover up. 

What amazes me about Scabs & Scars is that when you look at me now... 6 years later, Unless you really pay close attention, You will Not notice the scar I have across my face... It has faded, almost to the point of being completely gone.

Having a scab Is painful because it has to dry... It kinda pulls your skin back together again. Its not pretty at all! Its Black and ugly. There's a glimmer of hope though as you look forward to the scab to fall off, But if you remove the scab prematurely you have to start the process all over again from scratch... 

I think I pulled it prematurely once or twice but once the scab was ready & fell off, i was amazed at the new skin I received... It was lighter than the rest of my skin almost pinkish. Brand new with some white spots... Because it had not been exposed to the sun just yet. Scabs make perfection from imperfections. 

It was easier once the scab had fallen off, easier to cover the scar, Because the ugliness was gone now. I did the show for about a month with a scar... It was all good! And to think I was so worried!

When i look at myself in the mirror it all looks the same again. Perfectly imperfect! 

Some of us have wounds and scars that we keep peeling open prematurely... So we don't allow the adequate healing process to take place! We keep wondering why the scar is taking so long to go away but we keep picking at the scab... Once you let go and allow the scab to dry up completely... Fall off at its own pace... You will begin to see new growth, new skin and the scar begins to fade... But until we stop rushing the process we'll be stuck with a scar and No amount of bio oil will help :-)

Healing is a process, a process that requires patience... 

Allow Yourself the time.....