Random Thoughts... Poverty Mentality.

It's been said that when you grow up with Less its easier to become obsessed with having Much. Now for some Much becomes quality in stocks and bonds and well planned ideas that become lucrative financial residuals. However this is Not the reality for most.

For a very large population of people much means having a lot of stuff. Not necessarily Quality "Stuff"... Just a whole lot of Stuff!

I have watched the show hoarders and thought man... These people are really stuck in a low place where even collecting animal poo becomes okay.... Just because they have a need not to lose "stuff". It makes me sick to the bone.

So what in my mind of terminology is a "Poverty Mentality".
There are many Spiritual definitions to this fairly new coined phrase 'Poverty Mentality' but for me it's the little things people do that make me believe this mentality exists. For example.


You give someone something practical like new towels, but a year or two later when you go and visit they're still using the very old towels that prompted  you to buy the new ones? Their excuse being... We save them For the visitors?

Or maybe you've given someone what you consider the best gift you could've thought of only to find a year later they still haven't used it because they are saving it for the right moment.

I have visited some people who have an assortment of crystal items in a special display cabinet. Display cabinets in general sometimes just make me weary. Any way back to the crystal... You'll find the most beautiful crystal glasses on display, you may ask "how long have you had these they're beautiful" and they'll proudly respond going on about 28 years. Some of these I inherited from my mother, there is always a great story attached however, When you ask them, have you ever used it? They'll say No.. It's for Special occasions only. (Special Occasions come and go without them being used!)

There are some people who collect things. It can be anything. Some buy broken computers with the hope of fixing them and never do so they pile up. Others collect clothing items bags and shoes just to have plenty when they open their closet but never even use half of their collection. Others collect broken cars, Steel, Alliminium, Books. With no plan of doing something with it, just collecting it to have it for a rainy day.

Some buy new furniture but still feel the need to hold on to the old ones instead of blessing someone who needs your old ones. So you'd rather have a brand new couch and directly opposite to it your old one just to show you have more....


Then there are those who hide their good Quality silverware and will on a daily use the oldest ones some broken put together ones because they do not feel worthy to use the good ones... "That's for the visitors"

Some of you collect Accounts! Debt. Just because you look more important when you open your wallet and someone sees a display of credit cards. What they don't know of the debt you're struggling to pay off but it doesn't matter cause your Plastic display is All that matters!


The sad thing about all these examples I have given you is that most of these people do not value Themselves Enough to know that they Deserve to Use the Best. In their mind ITS BEST TO SAVE THE BEST FOR OTHERS. Yes, I understand this but only to a certain degree, I actually disagree with this type of thinking!

Some of you will die, Never having had a glass of water or wine in a crystal glass that you've kept for over 30 years and one day your grandchild will sell it to make space. Some of you will continually use the oldest face cloth and towel when you have a whole collection of new ones. Some of you will Never give away some of your clothes and shoes because you're waiting for the right event or occasion when there are thousands of people who do not have any. Some of you are stuck thinking to have Junk is to have more. To use a nearly rusted teaspoon on the daily helps preserves the stainless steel for my visitors... Some of you will hold on to the furniture your mother gave you until it completely loses its value when you could have sold it bought something more trendy and still Treated yourself to a Spa with the change. Then one day you'll die and your children will sell it because they never liked it any way! Some of you will drive a broken car and have three other broken ones when you can sell all 4 and have one that is in great working condition!

Some of you have taken the "ITS BEST TO SAVE THE BEST FOR OTHERS" Too far and having given up on your Dreams, your Purpose Your hope. So you invest all your time in making it happen for others when you know you have something Greater in you but the mindset of I'm not worthy keeps you afraid, keeps you wanting to give your best to someone else's dream when you could very well be Living your own!


If you live daily trying to please your Visitors and People and you have not come to a place of Valuing yourself to know that You should be using your best...  You are stuck with a Poverty Mentality!!

The day the light bulb comes on and you realize that I have Not lived my life to the full, it may be too late! The sad thing is you keep complaining that the rich are getting richer. I can guarantee you they know a little secret that helps them to grow.... They give!!! A Lot!! That may be your problem too, you find it hard to give, because you find it hard to let Go....

I would advise you today. You have a whole new year ahead of you to change your mind. Essentially that Is what repentance is right a change of mind. That I won't do this same thing I have done for many years expecting a different result... Change your mind and Live your life!

Use that Coffee machine someone gave you for your wedding gift, ten years ago or sell it and buy yourself something you like.  Sell the china you've been collecting for years. But never put on display or used it... It's just been collected in a box somewhere. Sell it and go on a holiday... Relax!

I know that change does not come easy for many But my dear friend You are the only who can change your situation around! Stop looking at what others can do for you! Stop looking at what others are doing! Stop Worrying about what others Are saying!!! Your Mind has held you back for so long... Aren't you tired of the same old same old???
Don't wait another day friend! Change today!

As for me me and house.... I'm Learning that holding on to the Old will Bankrupt me from the Beauty and Endless Possibilities of the New... I don't want to be Bankrupt with poverty I have created for myself!

If you know of someone who has this problem, they may not even see it as a problem. It may take you being open and honest with those you Love and helping them to live a life of better Quality with less Clutter!

Random Thoughts on Loss.

I haven't written in a while. I've been doing a lot of listening and thinking and in the meantime i've dealt with some loss.
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When you lose something it can inconvenience you, irritate you, frustrate you. You think to yourself I just had it... where did it go... how will i find it.... For a few seconds everything stops and goes a little crazy. Like losing your keys. Instantly there is a scurry through your purse, then you search the couch you last sat on and then you retrace your steps only to find it next to the refrigerator where you last had a drink, then your phone rang so you put it down. I Lost my ipod. I know its just an ipod but it was really special to me, 160GB, it had approximately 300 days of listening on it. My entire music collection including the ones i had collected along the way. Those that were on my computer and those that were not. I was a little lost without it for a minute. we had a special bond, You'd always find me with my headphones in my ears bobbing my head. Away in my own world, it made me happy!!! But losing my ipod a year ago helped me to open my ears, I was so closed off that I would miss out on good conversations and moments just being in my little world so i guess i had to learn from my loss.
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Losing an item cannot compare to Losing someone you Love. The Inconvenience, frustration, irritation can't come close to the reality that they will never be back... An item can so easily be replaced as i have done with my ipod, but a person.... I was recently scammed with the whole Visa Lottery thing, I was so excited at the thought of winning it, when i found out that it was a scam i was sad but my reality got checked quickly when i realized that someone had just lost their dad. So there was no time to be pitiful about something i could change or fix. In that moment as much as i wanted to be irritated or angry i had to focus on saying goodbye to someone i loved and respected. I Recently lost My Aunty Dolly who was very dear to me. She was a Queen! Her life made such an impact on me and my family for so many reasons! My heart was saddened by her going to rest but her life will forever be Alive because of the way she lived it..... Her garden was Perfect. In bloom at all seasons because she worked in it daily.  She always wore her dress with stockings and all even to cut the grass. She was truly Royalty the way she conducted herself, Soft spoken and Kind. She Loved others dearly. She cared for others deeply.
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As i say goodbye to her and the others who have gone to their resting place i search myself to check  where i am at. What are people saying about me now and what will they say in the future. Not that it always matters but what will my my children say about me one day?
_________________________________________________________________________________Like a tree being pruned to its perfect shape, i choose to work on my garden a little more!
Rest in Peace Aunty Dolly.

Random Thoughts on Trust

What is it about trust that leaves us as people so bruised once it's broken. We have the habit of sharing what is on our minds. Our thoughts, Our ideas and most dangerously our secrets with those who we believe we can trust. The truth of the matter is, When is it ever really a secret?   Humans we are and we love to share what we've heard and then Give our little opinion or add some advice, even when it is not requested. Truth be told, Even those we trust share what we have told them in the most confidence to those they trust and the cycle continues.  And so the story Grows. I guess the question is can we really trust? Or am I trustworthy for others to trust. ******* What is Trust?  Definition:1. Firm reliance on the integrity, ability, or character of a person or thing. 2. Custody; care. 3. Something committed into the care of another; charge.******** It brings me to the point that i'm not always open to let people in. Because i, (and I'm sure many of you) have been betrayed by some who i thought had my back only to find that they were behind my back sharing what i have shared and their opinions on who i am. What we say about others always comes back to the one we speak of  ;-). I've always been of the mindset that living life based on what others think will have you locked in a cage of insecurity. It will have you stuck without an opinion. I take my time to truly get to know the people i let into my world now, its a very small world for those who truly know me. My world is often under construction and renovation and even then i'm hesitant so I take my time because you bare the risk of being exposed no matter what. You bare the risk of being misinterpreted no matter what. Its a risk to trust. A risk that should seem worth it when you love.----------------------------------------------  I think sometimes that's why we find it so hard as Humans To Trust God when He has Clearly been there every step of the way. We look at what has been done to us in Human form and then somehow become hesitant to the Author of life. So we hide away from Him our flaws, as if He doesn't already know, afraid of what He might think or say. We walk in shame forgetting that He wrote the story and knows the ending. The problem is... We don't know... the ending. So we waiver and are afraid to truly Trust that it Will work out for our good. We forget His faithfulness and  so we forget how to trust!  -------------------------------------------------- I walk away from This with questions to myself.... Really searching and checking my heart. Am i truly trustworthy, and in my attempts to be human how many have I betrayed.... Even when i thought it was for good of them... Forget those who have betrayed me and sweep around my own front door! I remember as kids we swore to secrecy and kept our promise. We didn't even think twice. As Adults we just say a lot and I personally am challenged today. Challenged to rethink my stance and go back to the innocence of being a faithful friend, a faithful human. ----------------------------------------I'm challenged constantly in my imperfection! I guess that's what being human is about... We All have Flaws... Trust!!!

Random thoughts on Change.

Change:To cause to be different.  --------------------------------------------------------------------------------I guess the hardest thing about Change is that it's Just that... Change! The only Constant and yet the most difficult thing to face. It would seem that when change comes it takes some time to accept it because we get too comfortable and as a good friend of mine says, "We settle for Safe". Change pushes you away from safety and into danger where you're forced to take risks. Change takes away comfort because you need a little discomfort to push you to do something different. Change pulls out of you the truth that you've hidden for so long and now have to face and deal with.  Change will break you down completely but then slowly build you up again, Stronger,Better!! Change is Never easy, but change always is Necessary.  Change comes when you don't expect it but exactly when you need it.  Change is good! Even though you can't see it right now!!!  Change! It only makes you a better you!

Random Thoughts on Serenity

se·ren·i·ty/səˈrenitē/

Noun:	The state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled: "an oasis of serenity". A title given to a reigning prince or similar dignitary.
Synonyms:

calm - calmness - tranquillity - peace - composure This Picture to me encompasses the entire above mentioned definition....  Serenity Yesterday i sat and stared at the sky, as i often do. There is Nothing more Beautiful to me like the sky:) The Clouds, the Sun, the Moon All things Up there. Operating at their own pace without any help. A constant reminder of the the Reality that God is real! I Marveled at the Artistry of the view that had me Captivated. I watched how the sky like a Giant paint brush created new images smoothly transitioning from one slide to another. Colours intertwining and changing from clear blue skies to bright red burnt oranges and yellows to a deep brown and then finally to darkness. To best describe what i felt would be to compare it to Mozart's Srenenade #13 in G, K525, "Eine Kleine Nachtmusik"- Romanze Adante Every time i hear this Piece i feel Calmness, Tranquillity...

Since Coming Back to South Africa 7 days ago, We have been really busy with the details that go along with our Movement and the recording of a new album for New Breed Africa, which Completely excites me. Working with a group of people i have never worked with before. Getting to know their heart beat and then identifying with something inside of each one of them that unites us. Our common desire to serve. Which ultimately will keep us together. It's been crazy good like a roller coaster ride! I'm so Excited for the Opportunity to be involved in Something So much bigger than me... i :)...

Random thoughts about The Backing Vocalist!

The Art of blending is Priority in the Portrait of the backing Vocalist.

Understanding that you are not the the Primary Red, Yellow or Blue but rather a perfect blend of Violet, Green and Orange. Sometimes a little blue-green, or yellow-orange and at times red-violet. Its the perfect combination of the pallet of colors that make this portrait perfect!!

However in this Society of beautiful blends, are some not so beautiful art works...

There is a tendency to look down on the singers that may not have the range you have or may not have the experience you've acquired. A silent battle of the voices. That need to be recognized and to be considered the Best Backing vocalist and hopefully one day the artist. The need to get all the jobs on your own and not to share the possibility with others because there's a chance you may not get the gig. A stinginess. There isn't always acknowledgement for the gifts of other backing vocalists when you are striving to be the Primary color. There is also a sense of pride that comes, depending on who you've worked with and sung for or to. A certain "Know it All" based on where you've been and performed.

The common thread that all backing vocalists share or should share is the Love for the music.


There is a tendency to think.... You're irreplaceable and yet its easy to forget that some of Best voices have yet to be discovered!
It may Not be Yours!

In a room filled with Artists and entertainers, its more likely for the Artist to get along with other artists but the backing vocalist seems to walk around with an air that I don't need to get involved... I'll just do me.

I guess I'm rambling to say..... Be nicer. Be Kinder.... Remember the days when you were just trying to get there!!!! And someone who came before you showed you the way!!!! You know Some other backing Vocalists look up to you but you're too busy not caring to realize that you could help them be better, help them be greater, help them be more excellent... like you... If only you took the time to look beyond your own gift and your own excellence!

I guess I'm rambling to say Look at the bigger Picture...... The Portrait looks so much better When the Blend is Right:)

At the end of day.... It's the Artist people come to see anyway.....
So don't get caught up in your own hype:)
You're Not Irreplaceable!!!!

Get back to the Love of music and make beautiful Paintings in colors of harmonies and melodies....

Random Thoughts on Influence

Random Thoughts on Influence:

9 january 2012

Since coming home to South Africa I have had several discussions on influence and identity with family and friends. We are a culture with so many traditions, cultural differences and yet we are influenced greatly by Other cultures! Let me explain... See I work and live in a society that has influenced the world greatly. Its Music, Hollywood, Celebrity… America. But as far as I know only a very small percentage of that world actually cares about the beauty that is Africa. The Essence of our Continent that makes us Unique and different.

The Minority of Celebrities who have either been here on tour, who have fallen in love with our people, those who have organizations to feed and help the homeless & Then a selected few who have either been here on a missions trip or generally know the beauty and come here to appreciate it. Yet even with All the above that I have mentioned, It is a very small percentage. And Yet, We Marvel at the very existence that is America! Every move they make, their accent, the way they dress, their music, the extravagant way of living presented on television that is Not necessarily a true reflection of the entire nation.

Look I’m not pointing any fingers as I live there and in many ways have also been influenced but I guess in coming home I always look forward to our different accents and dialects which I have tried to maintain while living there. And after 5 years of being there, I still sound the way I did when I left for the most part! So I have been brought to question myself…. As they ask in Music, who are your greatest influences…. I loved coming home looking at television and hearing different sounds, cultures. Seeing different looks. But this time I was a little shocked. BAD Weaves galore, fake eye lashes on every corner. Besides our local soapes and news channels, so much has been influenced. ARE WE LOSING OUR IDENTITY AS AFRICAN PEOPLE? There are so many American South Africans who’s biggest dream is to go to New York, which is a great aspiration to have and I encourage it greatly, but it seems that we haven’t taken the time the teach our children about beauties of The Drakensburg, The Garden Route, The Kruger National Park, Table Mountain, God’s Window in Sabie, then to extend the beauty Zanzibar, The Victoria Falls, the White beaches of Maputo and so much more. We have so many treasures that we will never experience because we don’t know we have it. We are pressured to go far far away. And yet quality and beauty is right here… Some of us have never even been up table mountain and yet people from around the world come to see it!

For those who have travelled around the world, they will tell you that South Africa is still one of the most beautiful countries to behold and yet we don’t realize the gifts we have. The gift of family dinners every night. A simple smile given to our neighbors. The respect for our elders and each other. A hug and a kiss, which comes so naturally. We are slowly becoming a culture of me and mine. This saddens me so much.

Walking in the mall looking at little girls with their mom’s wearing wigs from the age 6 and up really troubled me GREATLY!!!!! What are we teaching our children? Our children only model after what they see, so if mom allows me to wear a wig at 6 by 15 skin lightening and soon after a boob job is in order. Not saying that any these are wrong but we open the doors for low self esteem and self hatred of which I know too well and as I look at these little children my heart breaks!! The pressure society puts on our kids is leading to a large number of unhealthy children with self inflicted diseases on the rise like anorexia an bulimia amongst boys and girls. The Hollywood we See, Love and Model after looks nothing like America as a whole. If we would just take the time to know that we have something really good!!!!

I walked around my hometown on New Years day. Nasaret Middelburg Mphumalanga. I saw kids who grew up right in front of my eyes some who have chosen to be different worked hard and some under the influence of alcohol and drugs at a very young age. Someone said to me…. Hey when you go back to America, tell little Wayne my kids said hello. And although it’s an innocent request from a dad to make his son smile, is this who we have chosen to be the models that our children follow after?

I guess this Blog is not directed at you, but rather at me. Moving to the states really made me very Patriotic about being South African as i realize how much we as a country actually know about others. We are Not Ignorant when we travel, we always take the time to find out more about other cultures and languages. And we are very loving, kind hearted people. We love to love and to give and to DANCE.... So I guess as I go back to the States I’m torn slightly, looking at myself wondering what is your biggest Influence Lois? And what is it that makes you who you are in the world you live in?


As I continue find myself a little more each day and as i journey, traveling the world, Learning from other cultures and countries. I hope I will never forget those who set the standard! The heroes we as a country celebrate and All those unsung Heroes No one Knows about. My desire is to NEVER forget, lose or change who I am! I AM AN AFRICAN… PROUDLY SOUTH AFRICAN! Let's not forget that that:)

The following biographies are taken from the South African Hall of fame.

Those who have expanded our horizons. 

The stuff of legends.

Nelson Mandela
1918 - ? Freedom fighter, boxer, lawyer, political prisoner, president and 'Father of the Nation'. He founded the ANC's armed wing 'Umkhonto we Sizwe' in 1961 and led his country into the post-Apartheid era in 1994. He won the Nobel Peace Prize in 1993.

Chris Barnard
1922 - 2001 Surgeon who performed the first human heart transplant in the world, in 1967. He was also the first to do a "piggyback" transplant in 1971, and the first to do a heart-lung transplant. He pioneered a system of post-operative intensive care that markedly decreased patient mortality.



Desmond Tutu
1931 - ? Archbishop of the Anglican Church of Cape Town, head of South Africa’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission and activist. He boldly engaged in a nationwide defiance campaign under Apartheid. Winner of the Nobel Peace Prize in 1984.


Steve Biko
1946 - 1977 Activist and black consciousness leader who preached Black solidarity to “break the chains of oppression”. He died in police custody after being beaten and interrogated for 24 days.

Miriam
Makeba
1932 - 2008 Singer and human rights activist was exiled for 30 years from her home country and is the first South African to win a Grammy award. She twice addressed the General Assembly of the United Nations and is a winner of the 1986 Dag Hammerskjold Peace Prize.



Saartjie Baartman
1789 - 1816 The 'Hottentot Venus', as she was called in Europe, was a Khoisan girl who was misled and humiliated in her short and tragic life, only to have further indignity bestowed on her after death.


Albert Luthuli
1898 - 1967 Mission teacher who became a leader of the ANC. He believed in non-violence and defied the Verwoerdian administration with protest actions such as passbook-burning. He was awarded the 1960 Nobel Peace Prize.

Enoch Sontonga
circa 1873 - 1905 Composer and teacher who created the song "Nkosi Sikelel' iAfrika", which became the anthem of three countries and generations of Africans.

Olive Schreiner
1855 - 1920 The first South African novelist of consequence, and one of the most significant feminist theorists of the twentieth century. Her most famous works were "Story of an African Farm" and "Women and Labour".

Nadine Gordimer
1923 - ? Novelist, essayist, screenwriter, political activist and champion of the disenfranchised won the Booker Prize in 1974 for 'The Conservationist' and the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1991.

Charlize
Theron
1975 - ? Oscar and Golden Globe-winning actress, dancer and animal activist had a major role in a hard-hitting anti-rape campaign in South Africa and frequently acts as an unofficial, but highly effective ambassador for her home country.



Those who have inspired us. Those who have defined us.
Those who have shown us our common humanity.

Saartjie Baartman
1789 - 1816 The 'Hottentot Venus', as she was called in Europe, was a Khoisan girl who was misled and humiliated in her short and tragic life, only to have further indignity bestowed on her after death.

Herman Charles Bosman
1909 - 1955 Irreverent and controversial master of the short story, once a death row inmate, who broke new boundaries with his satirical portrayal of backveld Afrikaners and the more seedy characters found in metropolitan Johannesburg.

Alison Botha
1970 - ? Rape survivor who was left for dead after suffering a horrifying attack that shocked a nation. Today she is an international speaker on rape and a successful author.

J. M. Coetzee
1940 - ? This Professor of Literature and author became the first writer to win two Booker prizes. He won the first in 1983, for the "Life and Times of Michael K." and the second in 1999 for "Disgrace". In 2003 he won the Nobel Prize for Literature.

Bram Fischer
1908 - 1975 Rhodes Scholar, lawyer and anti-Apartheid revolutionary who defended Nelson Mandela at the Rivonia Trial and died serving a life sentence for treason.

Athol Fugard
1932 - ? One of the country's premier playwrights whose works, many which were previously banned, deal with contemporary South Africa and the psychological and physical barriers confronted in trying to overcome Apartheid.

Emily Hobhouse
1860 - 1926 Humanitarian activist who exposed the horrors of concentration camps during the Anglo-Boer War. Her ashes are buried at the foot of the Women's Memorial monument in Bloemfontein.


Mike Horn
1966 - ? Adventurer and extreme sport enthusiast that has set several world records and firsts, among them the solo, unpowered circumnavigation of the globe.


Nkosi Johnson
1989 - 2001 Aids activist who was the longest surviving child born with the virus in the country. He became a symbol for sufferers after an emotional speech he made at the World Aids Conference.

Hugh Masekela
1939 - ? Renowned trumpeter and musical innovator who has popularised his particular brand of African music accross the globe for over four decades.

'Baby Jake' Matlala
1962 - ? Four-time world flyweight boxing champion who was the shortest man in boxing and retired successfully defending his crown, at the age of 40.

Precious McKenzie
1936 - ? South Africa has a hero who remains unsung in his country of birth. Precious Mckenzie had to overcome numerous trials during his lifetime to become the sportsman who some herald as one of the all-time greats.


Alan Paton
1903 – 1988
Former principal and famous author of Cry, the Beloved Country who tirelessly campaigned for a better South Africa during its dark years.

Sol Plaatje
1876 - 1932 Journalist, author and activist who wrote Mhudi, the first novel by a black South African. He was also a founding member of the ANC and had a major role in establishing Nkosi Sikilel i'Afrika as the anthem of freedom.


Gary Player
1935 - ? Golfing legend and philanthropist who has won 160-plus tournaments worldwide, including 9 Grand Slam tournaments. He was inducted into the World Golf Hall of Fame in 1974.

Walter Sisulu
1912 - 2003 Activist and patriot who was jailed for life in 1963, along with Nelson Mandela. He became deputy president of the ANC after his release in 1989 and has been the cornerstone of the "old guard" in the struggle.

Tokyo Sexwale
1959 - ? Freedom fighter, Robben Island prisoner, politician and entrepeneur who became the first premier of Gauteng, only to retire from politics when his term ended.

Zanele Situ
1979 - ? Javelin and discus athlete who became the first black South African to win an Olympic gold medal at the paraplegic games.

Josiah Thugwane
1971 - ? Hijack survivor, marathon runner and the first black South African to win a gold medal at the 1996 Atlanta Olympics.

Shaka Zulu
circa 1787 - 1828 Military strategist who assumed the throne of the Zulu Kingdom. After he reorganized the Zulu into a military clan, he soon forged them into a force unchallenged in Southern African kingdoms.



Some of the Heroes we know about! We All have our personal heroes let us not look too far For greatness, it's right in front and inside of you!!

Use your Influence for the Good!!